In this Blog Post
It's fair to say that we don't walk around with a full-length mirror in front of us constantly so we can check our behaviour. We are not that aware of the signals we are giving off or what behaviours we are subconsciously demonstrating. We are not always aware of our own personal impact on others.
Behaviour is very deep-rooted. It is driven by values, beliefs, motivation and attitude as well as our individual personality type. Because it is so deep-rooted, we don't look at our own behaviour in the same ways another will.
The trouble is, because our behaviour is so deep-rooted, and we have lived with it for so long, we think that the way we behave is absolutely correct. But, more often enough it's not what we think about our behaviour, it's the impact that it has on others which is more often enough the issue.
For example, we may think that we are being confident, but other people may look at that behaviour and think it's arrogance, others might think it's aggressive. We just don't know what the impact is on other people.
When we look at other peoples behaviour it is exactly the same. They are not always that aware of the behaviour they are demonstrating, but it's the way they behave and the way that it impacts us that causes the reaction that we have to them. We use this to choose the way we respond to them.
We don't know what is driving the behaviour. What we see on the outside could well be very different to what is going on from the inside. We can use the analogy of a swan on a lake. The part we see is the swan gliding through the water, it's almost regal. But, underneath is a very different story. The swan is paddling like mad to keep itself moving. But, we only see the top and this is what we really believe is going on.
Perceptions are a funny thing. When we meet someone for the first time we use perceptions to immediately build up a picture of the type of person they are, and this is what we use when deciding how to interact with them.
So, how can you become more aware of your behaviour and how others perceive you?
You don't need to be too over aware to the point of being paranoid about your behaviour, but being a little more aware of your behaviour can go a long way to building long term and strong relationships with people.
If you would like more guidance on understanding how you are being perceived and self-awareness, take a look at our Personal Impact Training Course for more tips like this.