Let’s be honest, we’ve all had moments at work where someone’s behaviour has tested our patience. Whether it’s a colleague who always seems to have the last word, a customer with endless complaints, or a manager who’s a bit heavy-handed, dealing with difficult people is part and parcel of working life. The good news is that you don’t need to dread these situations. With a few practical strategies and a bit of down-to-earth know-how, you can handle tricky personalities with confidence, keep your stress in check and even turn those tense moments into chances for better teamwork.
Start With Yourself: Stay Calm and Grounded
It’s easy to get caught up in someone else’s mood or take their behaviour personally, but keeping your cool is the first and most important step. When you stay calm, it’s like you’re putting on an emotional raincoat—other people’s negativity just bounces off. Take a slow breath before you respond, and check in with yourself. Are you reacting or are you responding? Even a few seconds’ pause can stop you from snapping or saying something you’ll regret later. If you feel yourself getting wound up, try the classic ‘count to ten’ or picture yourself somewhere relaxing. Resetting your own mood puts you in the driver’s seat.
Listen Like a Pro (Even If You Don’t Want To)
Sometimes, difficult people just want to be heard. Instead of jumping in to defend yourself or fix the problem straight away, try active listening. That means nodding, making eye contact and repeating back the gist of what they’ve said. For example, you might say, ‘I can see this is really frustrating for you.’ This doesn’t mean you agree with them—it just shows you’re willing to listen. Often, when people feel heard, their defensiveness drops and the conversation becomes much more manageable. And who knows, you might even spot a valid point hidden among the moans!
Set Boundaries (Without Being a Grump)
Every workplace has its larger-than-life personalities, but you don’t have to put up with behaviour that crosses the line. If a colleague is constantly interrupting you, or someone’s comments make you uncomfortable, it’s OK to speak up—politely but firmly. Use ‘I’ statements, like ‘I find it hard to concentrate when there are side conversations,’ or ‘I’d appreciate it if you could email me rather than calling outside of work hours.’ Setting boundaries isn’t about being bossy, it’s about protecting your own wellbeing and helping everyone understand what’s OK and what’s not.
Don’t Take It Personally (Seriously!)
This one’s a classic for a reason. Most people’s difficult behaviour says more about them than it does about you. Maybe they’re stressed, having a rough day, or just don’t realise the impact they’re having. Try to step back and look at the situation from a distance. Ask yourself, ‘Is this really about me, or is this just their pattern?’ Detaching a little emotionally helps you respond with empathy, not anger. Sometimes, injecting a bit of humour (where appropriate) can break the tension too—just make sure it’s light and not at anyone’s expense.
Pick Your Battles and Know When to Get Help
You can’t fix everyone, and not every disagreement needs a showdown. If something is a one-off or just a personality clash, it might be best to let it slide and focus on your own work. But if someone’s behaviour is affecting your wellbeing or the team’s performance, it’s time to act. Document what’s happening, keep your feedback factual, and talk to a manager or HR if you need to. Getting a fresh perspective can help you see the situation clearly and find a constructive way forward.
Practice Empathy (And Remember, You’re Not Alone)
Even the most patient among us have days when we’re not at our best. Try putting yourself in the other person’s shoes—what might be driving their behaviour? Practising empathy doesn’t mean making excuses for rudeness, but it helps you stay professional and compassionate. And remember, everyone struggles with difficult people at some point. Swap stories with your colleagues, share tips and don’t be afraid to ask for support. Together, you can make your workplace a friendlier and more resilient place to be.
Handling tricky personalities is a skill you can learn and improve with practice. If you want to boost your confidence, reduce stress and become a pro at navigating workplace challenges, our Dealing With Difficult People Training Course is packed with practical tools and real-world strategies. Check it out today and take the first step towards a happier, more harmonious workplace!
